A Model of Imperfection

When a friend asks if I will participate in a photo shoot for a breast cancer service announcement, and it happens to fall on an afternoon when my husband can be home with Little H, I agree. I’m a little hazy on the facts of what’s going on, but it sounds like a fun way to help out.

A wealthy Texas oil man is funding the project and is present at the shoot. His lovely wife, who screams money from her jeweled ears to her designer-shoe clad toes, accompanies him. Both are very kind.
8 of us “survivor” women are gathered to provide our faces. Actually, make that 7 survivors + me. I think I’m still just “a patient,” not yet having survived the ordeal in its entirety and earning the title. The other women all have their hair – and lives back. They are also 20-40 years my senior, as is common at these events. But they are all now my friends, dear to me for our shared experiences.

As a fairly tall and thin gal, I dabbled in modeling in high school. Well, dabbled ever so lightly, until the day came my agent told me I had to lose weight or I wasn’t going to go anywhere. That would be when I decided where I wasn’t going to go was back to that agency ever again. Who needs anorexia at 15?
Now here I am, some 13 years later, in cheap jeans, very little make-up, (in wild fear of losing lashes, I try to avoid touching my eyes, let alone putting make-up on them), and bald/scarf on my head. I look pretty awful and my body feels terrible as I enjoy the side effects of 2 blooming diseases. But all the same - actually, very little is the same, but you get the idea; I'm taken back to my fleeting modeling days in front of the lights and cameras. Oh wait, I'm afraid there's one more detail worth mentioning: I am totally sweating. I mean, visibly sweating through my thin, light-colored shirt. I don the very stylish, the very classy hoodie for my entire shoot, to hide this.

What can I say? I’ve been reading up on the harmful nature of aluminum in anti-perspirant and have been on a quest to use only the natural stuff. My most recent find masks any unpleasant scent, but certainly does not hinder the act of perspiring itself, or so I notice as the wet rings form around my armpits in the hot, Hollywood studio warehouse. Charming.

At the sickest time in my life, in a hoodie covering sweat rings and lacking head hair, I model for big time Hollywood guys and one big time Texas guy and feel a little bit lovely.

If you too would like to sweat - but not smell - I encourage you
to switch from an antiperspirant to a deodorant only.
My favorite is: Crystal Roll-on.
Here's a good article to start with
for the rub on antiperspirants in general: